What they don't tell you

In browsing various pregnancy forums, I have learned one main thing. There are a lot of dumb as shit women out there. (no, riding a bike will not "give you an abortion". Yes, your baby is alive even though it is not breathing air while it is inside you). My friend Jules and I have had numerous (drunken, sitting by the pool) converstaions trying to decide if people are really just that stupid, or if we are just that smart. Because lets face it, everywhere you go, someone is always making you wonder how they manage to function. And apparently, pregnancy bring the morons out of the woodwork. Gives a bad name to pregnant women and moms, if you ask me.

But aside from being shocked at peoples' intelligence levels, I am almost more shocked about all of the "OMG I DIDNT KNOW THIS WOULD HAPPEN" comments you see. Yes, being pregnant makes you fat. Yes, being pregnant makes your skin freak out. Yes, being pregnant makes you moody. Yes, being pregnant makes you tired. Yes, being pregnant makes you constipated. Yes, being pregnant can make hair grow on your stomach. Yes, the baby has to come out of THERE. No, your husand does not give two shits about what kind of bottles you register for. Seriously, do you people not have friends, or mothers? Because, uh, if you have ever met anyone who has been pregnant, you have heard all of this stuff.

The thing that nobody ever really tells you though, is that being pregnant is boring. There just isnt much going on. Every day at least one person asks me how I'm feeling or how things are going, and I usually answer with "fine", and they keep looking at me expectantly like I am going to have something to add. I dont know what people want me to say. "Oh I'm doing great, peed 6 times between the time I got to work and lunch, my belly is getting strangely fuzzy, got winded walking up the stairs last night, and I officially can't button any of my pants". Do they want to hear that? Probably not. Just like when they ask how a race went, they dont want to hear "well I pissed myself at mile 12, had to make an emergency stop at a port-a-john at mile 16 so I wouldnt shit my pants, and had a blood blister pop at mile 22". It's just stuff that nobody wants to know.

Speaking of marathons, I actually got a little teary eyed when I got the notification the other day that Chicago has filled up for this year. Yes, I'm thrilled to be pregnant, and duh, I didnt expect to be running a marathon a month after I have the kid, and yes, it will still be there next year. But after I did it last year, I sort of got it in my head that I was going to do it again this year. So it just made me a little sad thinking about not doing it.

Thats another thing that nobody tells you about being pregnant; that you will start to feel like you are missing out on stuff, and that it's NORMAL. But nobody ever tells you that, because, well, I dont know why. You're just sent the message that you are supposed to be 100% overjoyed about the prospect of being pregnant and having a kid, and any thought otherwise means that you are going to be a shitty shitty parent. So then when you DO start feeling kind of bummed about not being able to do this or that, you start feeling totally guilty for thinking that way in the first place. But, everybody says that being a parent means that you are in for a lifetime of feeling guilty about SOMETHING, so I guess this is a good start!

And on the topic of missing out on things, the other day I was thinking about the fact that summer is fast approaching, and that we live close to the Prairie Village pool. What's nice about that? They have an adults only pool! Yeah! We can go there and avoid all the kids at our neighborhood pool, and sneak in booze in plastic water bottles! For a minute there I honestly forgot that a) there will be no laying by the pool getting drunk for me this summer, and b) from here on out I am going to be one of THOSE people who takes their kid to the pool. Woah, man. Reality check.

16w4d

Car shopping, Hurley style

Those of you that know me know that Dan likes cars. As in, likes to get a different one every year or so. It's a disease. He has a spreadsheet of all the cars he's owned in his life, I saw it once, I think there are close to, if not more than, 40 on there. And for someone that is 39.....yeaaaahhh. He has slowed down a bit in the last few years though, he's only had 3 different cars since we started dating in 2005. And 4 motorcycles, but I digress.

I have been saying for a couple of years that "this is it! No more cars!", but now I mean it. I dont know, somehow it just doesnt seem very responsible to be trading cars like they are freaking baseball cards when you have a kid. Call me old fashioned. His latest car was a PT Cruiser, which I HATED, and may or may not have made fun of him relentlessly for driving. And my friends may or may not have gotten in on the action. But in all practicality, it's a pretty small car, and with 3 dogs and a new baby, I just thought we might want something bigger. Especially since I'd like to be able to keep a car for a while and use it when we have a second kid. Two kids and three dogs in a PT was DEFINITELY not going to work.

So here is what happens when someone like that marries someone like me who is all "I need immediate gratification, stop hem hawing, just do it NOW!":

Julie: so, I think we should trade the PT in on something bigger.
Dan: How about a Crown Victoria? (WTF?)
Julie: Um no, how about a Pilot?
Dan: OK
Spend a few days finding links to used Pilots
Julie: Want to go look at this one?
Dan: Sure. Tonight?
Go testdrive Pilot, be underwhelmed.
Salesman: Well if you like Pilots, you'll love the CX-9. Want to drive one?(we were at a Mazda dealer)
Dan: OK
Julie: OK
Testdrive CX-9
Julie: Wow, I really like it!
Dan: Me too!
Julie: Want to get it?
Dan: OK.

And that is how car shopping goes in the Hurley household. Although to be fair, it DID stretch into two days, because the first night we went to look, the banks were closed by the time we were ready to talk numbers. So we had to deal with all that the next day. At least we slept on it.

14w3d

Its a....

Baby! Yep, definitely a baby in there. I had an ultrasound last week at 13w1d (13weeks 1day, for those of you not up on the pregnancy lingo) to check for certain birth defects. It's called an Ultra Screen (or 1st Tri screen, or NT scan) and includes a blood test. Then they plug in the measurements they took on the ultrasound and the results of the blood test and your age into some program, and it spits out the probability of your baby having Down Syndrome and a few other chromosonal defects. It's optional testing, though I think most doctors recommend it if you're over 35. I'm not, but since I'm adopted and dont know any family medical history, figured it would be a good idea. Ok I'm lying, I just wanted an excuse to see the baby. Because even though I KNOW I'm pregnant, and my doctor had found the HB with a doppler at my last appointment, and I had an ultrasound at 6 weeks and saw the little flickering blob in there, and have been feeling like death....I still didnt really believe it. In my warped mind the blob we saw at the last ultrasound could have been some sort of tumor, and the HB I heard could have been mine. Granted, it was 176 bpm, but hey, that is a pretty normal running HR for me, so not out of the question. Except, I wasnt running at the time. But still! You never know. Anywho, here is the little bugger:

See, definitely a baby. Not a tumor. She was wiggling around all over the place and getting pissed when the doctor jiggled my belly (like a bowl full of jelly. Har) to get her to switch positions so he could get the measurements he needed. And I am calling it a her, even though we obviously dont know yet. I just think of it as a girl, and I dont like calling the baby IT. Conjures up images of scary clowns. And with the u/s picture already making the baby look like Skeletor, I dont need to think of scary clowns too. I truly, truly dont care what it is. Dan on the other hand, is hoping its a boy. But doesnt every guy? I keep telling him that he's so scared of having a girl that that's what we'll end up with for sure. And on that note, I made my appointment for the BIG ultrasound, so we should get to find out on April 21. Not too much longer!

Other than that, things are good. I'm officially in my 2nd trimester, and starting to feel better. Still feeling pretty crappy first thing in the morning and at night, but much more functional during the day. And, it's starting to get nice out, which is giving me the itch to go run. One of these nights I'll have to give it a whirl....if any of my running shorts still fit, that is.